at.yamomzcrib.com

so, you’ve heard about the jena six by now, right?

this image is from while seated

i’ve been trying to figure out why separate searches for the phrase “the jena six” and the 3 words the jena six give different search results. i mean, i understand why, but i don’t “know” why.

technorati has 2058 blog posts about this. when i click publish, that’ll go up by at least one.

the most dugg ((is that the correct terminology? i don’t really eff w/social bookmarking sites)) story on digg has 10 diggs.

somebody went and registered thejenasix.com and has been updating with the ongoing particulars. although, i think i got the most out of the updates from While Seated (although i would defintely avoid the comments on that page).

Petition Online is probably a neat thing, and maybe it’s really important to somebody, but i always disregard it as online bullshit. so, although i did sign it, i also wrote this lil’ entry about it. i implore you to do the same. somebody that googles into your blog for music, fashion & other bullshit would be well served to run into a lil’ injustice as well.

and, over here, we can find a few more links to places of action.

so, after reading Oh Word!’s Tao of TWIB, i decided to get up on my rss feed game. luckily, the good folx over at teh google had a reader ready and waiting to be populated w/my subscriptions. together w/my newfound bff firefox, i’ve been able to subscribe to 34 feeds in less than a week.

some would say, “that’s a problem.”
and, they’d probably be correct.

but, because of this great feeder (reader?, feed-reader?), i am no longer wasting time popping over to websites hoping to find new content. it’s cut down my “morning startup” time by 80%. i typically had a bit of hypebeast, a pop over to the starting five, maybe check the comments over at freedarko… then, maybe i would start working. that’s not sooo bad, seeing as though most of those sites update their content fairly frequently, but, what about some of the other sites you love, who are a bit more infrequent, like gabesaid or smashingmagazine for instance. no need to keep checking to see if something new is there for you. when i logged in this mornin, the reader had fresh new content waiting for me.

much like firefox, my new cellphone (samsung blackjack) and turkey clubs on tomato wraps, i don’t know why i didn’t make the switch earlier. now, the use of the rss reader hasn’t exactly improved my production at the office — the time i’ve saved by my decreased surfing has been almost matched by searching for new feeds and configuring them accordingly. also, because so many sites simply link to the content of others, i’ve spent time going to the source sites to eliminate the middleman.

i added my own feed to see how it would look, grabbed a plugin to improve it, then spent too much time trying to figure out why the date/time that i “published” didn’t match up w/the date/time that was showing in the reader. so, i guess that means you can subscribe to my feed now.

that’s a crock of shit.

i’ve been dealing w/my “sidearm” for the past 3 years now and it’s tough for me to meet people. because of this, i stopped goin’ to the clubs, workin’ out at the gym and doing all the other things that used to bring me into contact with attractive young ladies. so, i started using online dating services.

after a few, through craigslist, i was able to find a nice forum that was filled with understanding people who were either suffering w/the same problem or sympathetic.

so, me and “Mahogany” met at www.brownthighedgirls.com on the DatScat! board. she was into the same music as i was, liked video games and got a special tingle when i unleashed the bag’s chunky goodness upon her. she *really* liked it when i would pour it into her shoes and leave it there as a surprise for her.

eventually, we got engaged and i looked forward to the day that we would live as man & wife. about a week away from our special day, she goes on her bachelorette party and apparently, her girlfriends (nasty sluts that they are) payed the dancer to take a crap on her belly. she said the fresh warm soft-serve was the best she had ever had and that she was going to leave me.

i tried to find out what was in that guys diet in an attempt to win her back. i even began dumping my bag in her gas tank and writing letters on her windshield. it didn’t work and eventually she moved out of the city w/out telling me.

i loved her.
i still miss her to this day.

for the past couple of months, we’ve been tivo’n (dvr’n, tape’n, bootlegg’n) dora the explorer. because watching tv is a new phenom for the baby & dora is a new show for us, we have no idea what order these shows were supposed to be originally broadcast in. we set the box up to record, watch in whatever order and enjoy the story for what it is.

in basically every episode, dora’s got her backpack & her map, swiper’s tryna gank some of her shit, those three lil’ insects are floating in to play a lil’ Level Up! tune and we finish up w/ the “we did it” song. after watching a few episodes, you catch the hang of it, understand that Map is gonna give you 3 locations, swiper will quit if you perform the heisman correctly, your backpack will have whatever you need to finish your task, including an umbrella, sticky tape or this oddly shaped toy.

the best part about all this, is, although the baby understands the most basic of words right now (bottle, shoes, grapes, her sister’s name…) she knows that when the map comes out it’s time to sing the little map song. by watching enough episodes, parents and young poopers alike can get the gist. they immerse you into the world of bilingual anthropomorphic jungle bulls (wha?) as if it was standard practice to solve riddles to pass trolls on their way to a huge strawberry mountain. on the other hand, young D an’nem actually have episodes dedicated to the map, the backpack & all the recurring characters. the backpack explanation doesn’t happen until the 16th episode.

so, what’s that got to do w/blogging, you ask? as if you somehow forgot that i like to take the long route. well, i don’t need to write about “just-lightskinned” before i use it in a post. either you’ll get it because you can read in context, are familiar w/the term or have actually heard me say it in person. the same goes for viking style, cock-snigglin’, sakaar or any other reference/ slang/ colloquialism that is used.

assuming that my daughter (the lil’ one) can get down w/a lil’ lavendar squirrel that only speaks spanish, i’ll just go ahead and assume that you, intarweb user, can follow one of these posts. and, as long as i keep writing, i’ll still have time to dedicate an extra special post to explaining the slang in more detail.

special note: i hope writing about dora doesn’t lead any kids to this site. i have intentionally kept pictures of the lil’ bowl headed kid off this post. google images & microsoft live search are crazy bitches that don’t filter correctly and seeing as though my last posts have been dedicated to my favorite pasttimes of huge titties, takin’ a shit and drinkin’ to the point of puking, i don’t think the kids need to spend much time around yamomzcrib.

so, i downloaded the tiger style admin plugin from orderedlist.com and installed w/out the slightest concern of reading the instructions. along the way, i realized that it wasn’t working. this, of course, was because i was still using ie6. even after the good folks over at edited hipped me to the firefox plugin that would change all those text links to clickable jumps to boobie goodness.

so, ive made the initial jump over to firefox and tabbed browsing and i’ve found a real problem. at work, i keep one browser running for foolishness. it’s a diversion when things get bogged down and it allows me to stay focused on the other 4 windows (outlook/word, dreamweaver, wip explorer window & SQL) that i need to work. the only other distraction window is winamp (currently playing darling nikki by the foo fighters) keeping me at a good 4-2 ratio. if we include the 6 or so documents open in dreamweaver and the 4+ query windows that are typically open, then, well, the scales are firmly tipped on the side of work.

this is going to be a true problem. typically, i have a thought, google or wiki the answer and get back to work, but, now, i’ve got a wiki tab, a fantasy sports tab, this blog tab, and a tab dedicated to forum crusing. i’m fairly certain hoping that this is just the honeymoon phase and after lunch i’ll be back to drilling away at SQL, but right now i’m having a ball with these tabs.

if you haven’t made the switch — make it. don’t fall victim to that ie7 garbage. i’m so geeked out that i might get one of those lil’ buttons and link it from my sidebar.